Posts Tagged ‘Weddings’

Avoiding presents

March 17, 2010

Although most of us love receiving gifts, sometimes – for various reasons – we want to throw a party but not receive any gifts.

Sometimes it’s because we have everything we need and don’t want to burden our guests with the hassle and expense of seeking out gifts that aren’t needed in the first place. Occasionally the person simply does not like receiving gifts (strange but true!).

The question has been asked: how to request, on a party invitation, that the invitee NOT bring a gift? The simple answer is to print “No presents, please” in small lettering at the bottom of the invitation.  Another, more charming way is to use the following line: “No presents, please – your presence is all we need”.  I love the play on words.

As it happens, we used the latter line on our wedding invitation.  By then we were in our late thirties, and had already amassed all the homewares we could possibly need.  So our wedding invitation requested that no presents be brought…and it was very interesting to see who obeyed the request, and who ignored it!  About half the guests complied with it; the other half felt that a wedding gift is such a social imperative, they couldn’t possibly attend a wedding without bringing one.  (The interesting part was seeing who fell into which camp – and it was quite surprising: some close relatives brought nothing, whereas some less close friends brought expensive gifts.  Go figure!)

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The last word in bridal elegance: thank-you

July 31, 2009

Many a bride is full of energy and organisation, pre-wedding.  Checklists, spreadsheets, the works.  Then after the wedding, all that energy often collapses.  As a result, it’s sometimes months before the thank-you cards go out.  Not a good look.

I’ve noticed that delays in sending out thank-yous are often a result of (in addition to post-wedding exhaustion)  the cards having photos from the wedding on them.  This means a special print job which take weeks to organise with your photographer and printer.  Meanwhile, momentum is lost as the excitement of receiving the gifts fades.

With this in mind, I have two tips for brides (or anyone helping plan a wedding):

  1. Get the thank-you cards printed at the same time you have your wedding stationery printed.  Or buy some tasteful pre-printed thank-you cards from a stationery store.  Either way, have thank-you cards waiting and ready to go before the wedding.
  2. Write the cards up as soon as possible after the wedding.  If you’re not immediately going on your honeymoon, write up those cards before you leave, and get them in the mail.  You’ll be pleased not to have the weight of this future chore hanging over your head while you’re away.  It doesn’t need to be a long note – a brief but sincere thank you is all that’s required.  People understand that you’re busy at this time; you can catch up with them in more detail later.  If you know you’re going to drag your heels on this chore, co-opt your husband or a friend to badger you into completing this task by a certain date.

If your heart is set on being an elegant bride, part of the package is getting those thank-yous out in a timely manner.  ‘Thank-you’ really is the last word in being a truly beautiful bride.